Eternally pig-in-the-middle, he is emotionally tossed between High Pines (a residential home for the elderly run by Mrs. Bannister and his mother) and his beloved Bayswater;

Stanislaus Spolianski, the housekeeper's son, is an underdog full of resentment. He seethes in his Bayswater house and lets rooms to people he delights in despising. Eternally pig-in-the-middle, he is emotionally tossed between High Pines (a residential home for the elderly run by Mrs Bannister and his mother) and his beloved Bayswater.